Life’s a Romp – My Life in a Romper!

“Christian, don’t you think that title’s a little redundant?” – Graham Bowling “NO.” – The Public This fall has been a total romp. Alright, already. And by total romp, I mean I wore a powder blue, men’s jumper to Lebanon’s 35th Annual Country Applefest. Was that smart? Nope. Did I lose a bet? Yep. It…

Wisdom Teeth Rambles: Six Fast Casual Joints I Need Now

DISCLAIMER: I did two things right after my wisdom teeth removal. 1) Write this blog. 2) Shoot this Oscar-winning film: DOUBLE DISCLAIMER: If you’re not having fun by the second concept, it really doesn’t get any better. Just click a banner ad and hope it makes you download Flash Player. *Clears Throat* _____________________________________________________________________ You know…

How to Squeeze Summer Fun into Your 9-5

Would you do just about ANYTHING to hang up your work pants and watch a pool full of people this summer? Well hate to swat your snow cone—but now that we have to shell out to get our own moles checked—getting paid in pizza and the best tan of your life isn’t going to cut…

Tanzania Taught Me Missions Matter

Have you ever tried to shove the best experience of your life through a 1,400-word funnel? Well here comes EVERYTHING. Earlier this month, five of my closest buddies and I got the opportunity to take a pilot mission trip to Tanzania. And by pilot, I mean if any of the six slipped and fell into…

Things Animals Do That People Should Too

Let me be the first to inform you: I’ve been to the zoo a few times. After each visit, I’m left in a dissociative state, quietly crooning, “whHhhy, oh wHhhHhy caAaaAn’t IIIII?” Don’t get me wrong, credit card debt is a blast—but wouldn’t you rather sit in your mom’s pouch? Don’t answer that. Just to add insult…

Hot Slang You Should Use in 2017

When was the last time you sunk your teeth into a new, juicy piece of slang? BARF. Since most us are unwilling to jump jogger-first into #TEENWORLD, it’s time to just start making stuff up. Hand-picked using 3 sets of Bananagrams and a cursed Yahtzee cup, these 5 words are sure to make 2017 “totally lit.” Kumquat…

I Found Myself at a Women’s Conference

  I’ve always been a huge advocate for making myself uncomfortable, it’s the only way to grow, and it’s the only way to stretch your heart.  And honestly, I’ve been doing a terrible job of that lately—until last week. The 3% Conference is a woman’s conference. The main goal is to equalize the ratio of…

Cool New Ways to Be Affectionate

Aren’t you just SO tired of quenching your need for physical touch in the same stupid ways?  Like, would somebody get some innovation over here please? Holding hands: Dumb. Fist bumps: No good. Making out: UGH so BOoOooooRRRiiNNNgGgG. It’s time to show the world you’re a creative lover—without turning your bedroom into a fair. Cause… After…

How Cincinnati Works

According to a recent study, conducted at the Red’s Stadium, sample size: 6 Cincinnati is by far the best city in Ohio. But for every cheese coney, there’s a dark secret: AKA a bunch of stuff I just DON’T get. So let’s navigate each quirk together—and just because I’m pointing them out doesn’t mean we should try to fix them….

How Big of a TOOL Are You?

Last week, the 8th grader who shadowed me at work told me no one calls each other tools anymore, and that I should probably just delete this. Thanks Braden, you were right. Ever walk away from a conversation wondering, “Was I being a tool?” Or the slightly more aware: “Boy, I wonder how big of a tool I…

9 Things I Don’t Miss About Being a Kid

^^Laugh at children. We are superior. There are many things to miss about childhood: Naps, Flintstone Vitamins, and predictable body functions to name a few. There are also 9 things we should all be glad died young. BOOM. And they’re below. Asking for Snacks Growing up, every time I wanted to shove a Ho Ho down my pie hole…

#BadStartUps: Kit Men

Has your cat only burned through 6 of its 9 lives? Would your quality of life improve if Scooter was 6-feet under? Feel guilty about killing your cat with your own cold, dead hands? Well shut up and grab some mittens—it’s time to call the Kit Men. **Now that I have you attention, this post…