Did it hurt… When you fell from [Week] 11? [SF Blog]

…When a cute girl enters the elevator. Fist pumps if you’ve done this at least once.

If this box confuses you click the top left corner for sound!

I’m going to be real honest, last week was varying levels of strange. I don’t even know where to start… SO I’M JUST GUNNA PICK A SPOT.

On Wednesday I had to pop all the balloons and sweep up the confetti because my 2 week-long party without my boss was over. And THANK GOODNESS for that because the desk we share and my heart had a HUGE Max-shaped hole in it. Which means I have WAY more things to do, hands up for that!

Thursday was a super long day because Max, Olivia, and I traveled down to Palo Alto for a US Angels pitch event. Let me tell you about something about US Angels… that event is like you lit up Zanesville while it was still full of zoo animals. AKA it’s pretty much a MESS. You get 20 minutes to pitch. That means if you do not like the company presenting, which is more than likely, you have to spend the other 19 minutes and 58 seconds wishing you were being eaten alive by genetically modified super ants. OR KILLER BEES. During that 20 minutes, people can stand up and shout things, come in and out of the room, sling poo, and do pretty much WHATEVER they want. Oh and you have to pay $1000 to pitch there.  Give me #PitchForce or give me death. Good news, this US Angels event was actually pretty good.  I also met a guy from Columbus, OH who was pitching his synthetic throat company, YOWZA! He was super nice and his daughter is going to be freshman at Ohio State next year, even though she visited Miami four times. We didn’t want her anyway. Just kidding lololololol.

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After loony-ville the three of us went to VCTaskForce where companies have 2 minutes to pitch, “no notes, no nothing” to a panel of angel investors. The event is super fun and very entertaining event because there are some INTERESTING people who roll up to these events.

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^^ Max telling someone to get their act together. (Hahahahaha).

I went HAM on these coconut-crusted chicken skewers that they served there. I did not realize until my final skewer that the chicken in the skewer was the oh-so-promising shade of tickle me pink. I spent the next 3 hours trying to keep my dinner from coming out of either end of my body.

I SURVIVED.

Friday was a HUGE day for our program because our capstone projects were due that day! The project was a 10 minute pitch of our own startup to a panel composed of Glenn Platt’s close personal friends connections. The teams for this project were the 4 bros (including me) from upstairs vs. the 4 ratchet girls that live below us vs. 5 bozo guys from the second house, vs. a solo game designer. Needless to say, ALL of us have been working on this project diligently since the day it was assigned. Holy smokes, that is horse hockey. Everyone threw together the project last second, and they actually ALL went super well! AND it was at an Alumni-owned vineyard. Cool beans.

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Our startup was called The UnderSound. In case you were curious, but you’re probably not…

The UnderSound is an audio fingerprinting mobile application that allows users to engage with advertisements via social media platforms in exchange for perks offered by advertisers.

Not-so-fun story: After racking our brains trying to figure out who the panel was to see how far we could slack off, the secret was finally revealed the day of. Rich Moran is one of Miami’s most famous alums, he is a venture capitalist, author, and multi-millionaire extraordinaire. We visited Rich earlier in the semester and we were all terrified he was going to show up and beat us with a bat critique us. I find out 10 minutes before the presentation that “Rich will be there.” Eff. Turns out it’s the vineyard owner’s husband Rich, not Rich Moran, so I start doing the happy dance. Pressure is off.. we are presenting to Glenn, an alum, and her husband! LOL JUST KIDDING. The vineyard owner’s husband is the CMO of Groupon. That was a shocker. Rich Williams was awesome. He has tons of great advice and chatted us up for a few hours. I am actually thankful Rich was there, he’s a boss and a great connection.

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^^ #TeamAwesome

Friday night was a… memorable cultural experience.

And my first accidental gay bar experience.

Jenny, Brielle, Sean, Brian, Macy, and I visited the “Lookout”, a really cool-looking bar in the Castro. After Macy almost broke her ankle walking down a slight incline, we arrived! The gays know how to party. There was a state-of-the-art LASER LIGHT SHOW, disco balls, house music that would make Jesus Christ himself want to dance, and fruity drinks. It was fun, but kind of dead, and as much as I love house music, I like to sing along to my favorite top 40 pop hits. So SEE YA. I also got hit on which was really uncomfortable, but whatever.

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^^ The always coordinated, Macy Mills.

We hit up another bar called “The Cafe” which was NOT a cafe and was absolutely insane. The place was wall-to-wall packed, had people walking around with test tube shots, I don’t even know what that is, the best music you have ever heard, and the occasional dude in thong, which was REALLY-FRIGGIN-WEIRD but also really hilarious. It also closed 10 minutes after we got there… which was probably for the best… (hahahaha)

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^^ BOOSH BOOSH BOOSH BOOSH

On the way home our Uber driver (way better than taxi service that is taking over the world) baked us chocolate chip cookies, because he was a boss.

Needless to say it was a memorable evening, and something you have to do once. And I did. Yay culture.

Sunday was Easter, my first Easter away from my family and it was actually REALLY rad.

Hannah & I recruited Clay and Brielle to go with us on Sunday and they really enjoyed it. Josh (our 27 year-old, ultra hipster pastor) completely obliterated his sermon. Top 3 best sermons I  have ever heard. It should be available online at some point via podcast, so stay glued to this post for the link. It’s SO fun inviting people to church, I recommend taking a leap of faith and doing it, you never know what kind of magic can happen!

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^^Church in SF is like having church in Jurassic Park

This year was a strange year for Easter because it was also 4/20, which is for some reason National Pot Smoking Day… or something. I’m pretty sure I got second-hand high from walking to church through the Haight/Ashbury area.

HE HAS RISEN… and so has everyone else, because they’re high as friggin kites.

See you in 9 days, but who’s counting.

Cheers,

Christian

 

 

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